3/12

I found out that Grace Baptist holds a Divorce Care. I began going to it this past week. Woooow, I am so glad the church has this God centered support group. This will truly allow me to heal. Praise you Jesus for allowing me to attend this.

2/20

It's definitely been quite some time since I've updated my blog. I think I've just been sticking to facebook.

I'm thankful for where God has brought me. I've come so far but I seem to be in the beginning stages of His great plans for my life. I'm not sure what His plans are yet. I'm living a life where I have to take it one day at a time. I can't even guess where I'll be a year from now. All I can do is trust Him.

My divorce will be finalized next month. It is because of what Jesus has done for me that I have been able to forgive Gus. Though there are huge huge scars, I can truly say that God has healed me tremendously.

I am so thankful to have me, myself, Megan back. I laugh a lot. I smile a lot. The only thing that use to come from me was tears, as my family can testify. You almost don't know how to receive such a privilege when God offers you a second chance. A second chance to serve in singleness and a second chance to marry who HE wants me to marry (in His timing).

My blog could never hold all the days, weeks, months, and years of abuse I was under. My dream is that one day I could be a godly spokeswoman for other abused women. The opportunity would allow me to share with them how my darkest moments with man became my sweetest moments with Jesus.

12/18

Wow, thank God someone offered to take me down to Grace Community Church every Sunday morning. I've been missing it as well as all my people!

12/12

I now rent a room from a Christian woman in Valencia. I like the place and am grateful for it. I don't have a car so I've been going to Grace Baptist, which is closer to my home. But I'm praying that I can find a ride for Sunday mornings to Grace Community because I'm really attached to the church.

The neighborhood around here is so nice that the girls and I have been enjoying the walks. The Christmas lights are amazing and it's so much fun to see the girls get so excited when they see them.

I have been to court so many times that I'm grateful it's ending. My case is now entering the final judgment and my last court date is in February, which is separate from my divorce. I hate the word "divorce" and find it a bit embarrassing to admit that that is what's happening. But that is where my life has turned so I'm trusting God for the future.

11/28

I've ended up staying with my sister. I'm really praying where God will have me stay permanently. Getting a job is a definite for me down the road. It breaks my heart at the thought of leaving my kids in a daycare center but that looks like what will be happening.

The longer I live in a peaceful environment the more I see my girls doing better. They literally lived in a nightmare their entire lives so I know they are internally dealing with a lot. But God is good and He is going to get up through this. I couldn't imagine what I would do without Him.

11/06

Yesterday I went to court and God was completely on my side. No matter how many accusations my husband made against me he was still forced to go to AA and have therapy to face his "past demons." I totally didn't expect him to get so "slapped" but God was definitely fighting for me.

I now have an attorney and was informed that the divorce won't be finalized until March.

My kids are taking everything in an okay manner. Trudi does fight a lot with me, which I don't allow to go unnoticed, and Heidi is surprisingly pretty fine.

Some of you may be wondering how I am feeling. I feel sad that all of this is happening but very relieved at the same time how much God is fighting for me as well as providing. I really don't hurt over my marriage. Do I want to get remarried? Absolutely, and I am praying that God will provide a godly man to help me raise these girls. I know God's timing is perfect. Right now I rest in the trust that I have in God that He has planned out all my days. Right now He has me exactly where He wants me to be.

Thank you God for your provision.

10/21

I have to be out by the first of the month since I cannot afford the next rent payment. God has yet to provide a place for the three of us but I know He knows our needs. Please please pray for His provision.

My husband did not contest the divorce so I'm having to finish it on my own. It may be finalized within the next two months if not sooner.

My girls remain in happy spirits and I'm thankful for God giving me patience each day through this trial.